Radio Silence

It’s been a while since I posted an update on my blog, and that’s because there has been a LOT going on. But, I actually don’t have a lot to say about everything that’s been happening, so I’ll just give you the short version and if you have any questions, feel free to ask me in the comments or shoot me at email to cody@luanded.com.

Simply put: I recently went through a divorce & moved home to North Carolina to be closer to my family.

I know it seems like I should be a hot mess (at least that’s what people keep telling me) but I REALLY am okay. It really just boils down to Trace & I both wanting extremely different things for a very long time -basically since the beginning of our relationship almost seven years ago. We tried desperately to compromise and find some middle ground. But I missed my family fiercely. After a few years of being away, my mom’s health went downhill & I began to become depressed & struggled horribly with anxiety & panic attacks. Even after I was able to visit two years ago (after not seeing my family for five years) it just made the depression worse because it affirmed that I needed to move home – my heart is in these mountains, with my people.

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The anxiety & depression became so bad I would become physically ill if I tried to leave the house for any reason, and I was diagnosed agoraphobic with general anxiety disorder last year & began medication to help control the panic attacks. I begged Trace to move back to NC with me so I could be closer to my family & heal my soul. Trace’s job & family is in Kansas City, and he wasn’t willing to leave those behind. Β I totally understand why he didn’t want to move, being so far from my family hurt my soul terribly. However, a few months ago, I made my decision that I couldn’t handle being away from my family anymore & needed to move home.

Understand this:Β I’m totally fine with his choices and I respect them. Trace is a great guy – he is driven, committed to his family & his career, kind, sweet, generous & he is going to make amazing things happen in this world. I love him, and will always respect him & consider him a friend.

We both understand we truly just want different things from life, and are being pulled down different paths. It was a difficult decision to make but we both know it was the right one, and are amicable about it & will remain friends.

And that is what’s been quaking my world & shaking things up over here & is why I have been so quiet on social media of late. I arrived in Western North Carolina with my son last Sunday & settled in for the next few months at my brother Timothy’s house. I’ll be looking for a rental after the holidays, but right now we’re just settling in & adjusting. I’ve already resumed monster making full time, and should be doing a stocking soon (I have two dozen stuffed monsters ready to go & even more in the works!) and after Thanksgiving I am going to push for one more big Mon-stor stocking before the holidays – to be sure you don’t miss out, visit my shop & sign up for email notifications of new listings at the top. (Subscribers get first notice of new listings!)

 

4 thoughts on “Radio Silence

  1. You know, I was totally thinking of you yesterday! And I’m happy to hear things are going good for you, sometimes in life the road takes an odd turn but I think you’re handling it better than…. anyone would! I’m happy to hear your monsters will be once again filling my newsfeed!

    Like

  2. I’m glad it didn’t end on a horrible note. I know that tends to happen a lot with people I know.

    I know how you feel about feeling depressed, etc. when you’re away from home. That happened to me too but my bf said he would be willing to move to where my family is once I’m done with school. My family is in Cali while his is in Maryland.

    Like

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