I’m in a weird transitional period after the divorce, moving halfway across the country & adjusting to living in less than 200sf with my son – and so now, more than ever, I need to cling to all the things that I am grateful for & remind myself of them daily (hourly, sometimes every five minutes, even). I’ve struggled with depression, agoraphobia and anxiety for years, and my schedule/living habits/environment changing over the past two weeks has certainly shaken me up a bit. I won’t even sugarcoat it – I’m struggling to adjust & I can feel myself slipping into a depressive, anxious mood.
It is nothing that time won’t heal, but with my 30th birthday just days away & today being Thanksgiving and all, I decided to make a list of thirty things I’m thankful for – because I’ve always felt recounting all the goodness in my life helps me push away the heaviness that settles like a blanket over my brain uninvited sometimes, and despite the anxiety from adjusting to a new living situation, I am very, very happy to be home! Happier than I have been in such a long time.
So! Here’s my thankful thirty:
- Most importantly, and I tell myself this every day: I am thankful to be alive. I am thankful to have today, and all the days before today. I have no regrets, and I am so grateful to have woken up with air in my lungs, dreams in my mind & stars in my eyes.
- I’m so very, very thankful to finally be home with my family.
- I’m especially thankful that I can be here for my parents golden years & help get my ma into a more comfortable living arrangement.
- I am so very thankful to my brother & his wife for opening their home to me during this weird period of my life.
- I’m thankful for having a warm, cozy, colorful space to live.
- I’m thankful to have food to eat & clean water to drink.
- I’m thankful to be able to bathe regularly.
- I’m thankful to be fortunate enough to have warm clothes to wear.
- I’m thankful my family supports me pursuing my passion.
- I am thankful for my sweet sister-in-law Leslie, who is always willing to listen to me pour my heart out.
- I’m thankful Leslie knows how to cook, because I sure don’t.
- I am so thankful that my son is enjoying this new living arrangement & is adjusting well to our new life.
- I am thankful my dog gets along with my brother’s dog, or this whole shared home situation would be a lot more chaotic.
- I’m thankful to finally be present to help out with all my nieces and nephews every day.
- I’m thankful my siblings don’t mind me using my nieces and nephews as product models.
- I’m thankful my son loves to learn & discuss big ideas.
- I am thankful that my is enjoying his new school & he has made friends very quickly.
- I’m thankful for the opportunity to volunteer at his school & share my love of art with children.
- I am thankful to be surrounded by the natural beauty & breathtaking splendor of the Smokey Mountains every day.
- I am thankful for technology & the ability to communicate with my creative community & friends no matter where I live.
- I’m thankful I am able work from home. Because driving in the mountains in the winter is not for the faint of heart. Or minivan owners. But mostly because I don’t like changing out of my PJs.
- I am thankful I have a reliable vehicle that gets me where I need to go (& almost fits all my nieces & nephews for family outings. Seriously. I have a lot of them.).
- I am thankful for all the people who have reached out to me during this time, whether just to say hi or to offer words of encouragement.
- I am thankful for friends who make an effort to stay in touch, even when their life is wildly chaotic, because they know when I’m in a schlump I shut myself away from the rest of the world and become an anti-social slug.
- I’m thankful for wifi, because without I couldn’t communicate with anyone since my cell phone doesn’t get reception out here in the boonies.
- I’m thankful for my good health, my son’s good health and the general good health of my entire extended family at this moment.
- I am thankful that my divorce was amicable & we were able to part ways without drama. Trace is a great guy & I’m glad I can still call him my friend.
- I am thankful my baby daddy & I were able to reunite amicably, become friends again, and that my son adores him & welcomes him so willingly into his life.
- I am thankful that I have as much time as I need to get my crap together.
- I’m thankful for each and every person who has ever supported my business, or talked about my business, or even just said “Hey, I like what you’re doing!” All of those guys are what fuels my creativity and keeps me going. I love you guys.
Making this list was so cathartic, I decided I needed to make this a daily practice, so that I can return to my habit of beginning each day with a grateful heart and a happy, healthy mindset. I set a notebook by my sewing machine & plan to make a short list of things that I’m grateful for each day. I encourage you to try it out as well, if you are struggling to find the silver linings in your own grey skies. And if you, like me, struggle with depression and/or anxiety, please feel free to reach out to me at firstname.lastname@example.org to share your the heaviness. ♥
Here’s to a day of grateful hearts & thankful minds, but more so, here’s to living an intentional life of gratitude. Happy Thanksgiving, friends.